Students, Parents Debate Merits Of 'Day Of Silence'
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David Slone-dslone@timesuniononline.com
"That's so gay."
"He looks like a homo."
"She looks like a dyke."
They're expressions that have become common in some American students' vocabulary. They even pop up in mainstream movies and music. But to a gay or lesbian student, they're demeaning words used to bully a person because of their sexual orientation or gender expression, according to Daryl Presgraves, media relations manager with Gay Lesbian Straight Education Network.On April 25, high school and college students across the country will speak out against bullying of gay or lesbian students simply by not speaking at all.
They may remain silent when called upon by a teacher. They may keep quiet when another student asks them a question. It's all part of the National Day of Silence.
Presgraves said students from 55 Indiana schools have registered to participate in the Day of Silence, including students from Warsaw Community High School. More students from other schools are expected as the date gets closer.
Schools do not sponsor the Day of Silence. Students take up the day on their own and it is student led, Presgraves said.
According to the GLSEN Web site, the National Day of Silence brings attention to anti-lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender name-calling, bullying and harassment in schools. This year's event will be held in memory of Lawrence King, a California eighth-grader who was shot and killed Feb. 12 by a classmate because of his sexual orientation and gender expression.
American Family Association, a conservative group, encourages parents to keep their children out of school on that day. The association also encourages parents to speak to school officials in opposition to the Day of Silence.
The AFA Web site states, "If your school is listed, call your local school and ascertain whether they officially or passively allow students to observe 'Day of Silence.' If your school is listed, please double-check with your local school to see if the school is actually sponsoring DOS. ... We sincerely hope your school, if listed, is not actually an official sponsor. If it is not, we will take them off the list, if a school official asks us to do so."
The AFA Web site also offers tips to parents, telling them to inform the school of their intention to keep their child home on that date and explain why. The Web site tells parents to "Explain to your children why you're taking a stand: Homosexual behavior is not an innate identity; it is a sinful, unnatural and destructive behavior. No school should advance a physically, emotionally, and spiritually destructive sexual lifestyle to students."
As of Tuesday, the AFA listed WCHS as one of the participating schools.
Rich Franco, Leesburg, has two children at WCHS. "The concern is that they force the recognition of a given lifestyle on the student population without any regard to what the rest of the other students' beliefs are," he said.
Franco said students have the perception that the Day of Silence is sponsored by the school. He said there are more valuable things students could benefit from than the Day of Silence.
Warsaw Community Schools Superintendent Dr. Robert Haworth said they have requested AFA to take Warsaw off the list twice as of March 20. Haworth said the school corporation does not have a position on the Day of Silence. WCS is not sponsoring or promoting it, he said.
"With that being said, we are very aware of the diversity in our building and in our corporation. It is not our intent to infringe on the First Amendment right of freedom of speech of anyone unless they are disruptive, causing harm or putting a kid in danger," said Haworth.
Ken Falk, legal director for the Indiana American Civil Liberties Union, said Haworth seems to be on target. The U.S. Supreme Court has said that while students keep certain Constitutional rights while in the school building, expressive activity must not be disruptive. If it becomes disruptive, the school corporation can curb or restrict the behavior. For example, Falk said, a student can't stand up during class and protest the war because that would be disruptive.
Courts today, Falk said, are going to defer more to school administrators than to parents as to whether something is disruptive or not, up to a point.
Presgraves said GLSEN encourages students interested in participating in the Day of Silence to talk to the school administration in advance to make the day as much of a positive experience as possible. If the administration supports the students, but prefers the students speak in class, then Presgraves said the students can be silent during lunch and other breaks. The day is "not set in stone."
Schools don't often know how to address bullying of gay or lesbian students, Presgraves said, which is why students often hear expressions like "that's so gay" in the hallways.
And on the Day of Silence, Presgraves said, some students don't know how to react so their bigotry comes out. Participating students - gay or otherwise - are sometimes harassed.
"What does that say about the harassment gay and lesbian students feel every day?" Presgraves asked. "A lot of students participating are straight and know this is a problem," he added.
But some parents said school is not the appropriate place for the silent protest.
Gina Keener, Leesburg, has two sons and a niece who attend WCHS.
"My concern is for the safety of the children," Keener said.
Last year when the Day of Silence was first held at the high school, students were less than kind to the participating students. They knocked marker boards out of the students' hands that the silent students used to communicate, she said.
Haworth said he doesn't believe any incidents or disruptions were reported to the office on the Day of Silence.
Keener said she wants everyone to be respected, but doesn't believe school is the place for the event.
"We feel it's just not the place to have this," Keener said.
"I don't think you go to school to be gay or to be straight," you are there to learn math and science, she said.
"If they're going to be gay, that's their choice. Why make a day out of it?"
She also worried about the event creating a potential backlash.
"They try to make it better, but they are only making it worse," Keener said.
Presgraves said disruptions do not come from the students participating, but from people who misrepresent what the day is about.
"If you're against the day of silence, then you're for the bullying and harassment," said Presgraves.
The Day of Silence, he said, is not about changing people's beliefs. It is about changing people's behavior toward others. It is an anti-bullying program.
Keener said last year, students at Warsaw wanted to wear shirts that said they were "proud to be straight," but were not allowed to wear shirts by the administration.
Haworth said he is not aware of any incident involving shirts or students wanting to wear "pro-straight" shirts last year. But, he said, students opposed to the Day of Silence could have a day of their own to protest.
Falk said that would make perfect sense for both sides.
Haworth said WCHS has five Bible study groups that meet in the building. That is a committment and a choice the students have made. He said just as he would not infringe on the Bible study groups' First Amendment rights, he also wouldn't interfere with the rights of other organizations that don't disrupt or cause harm to students.
Keener said her children will not go to school April 25, even if it is an unexcused absence.
"What's the point?" Keener said. "All kinds of stuff will be going on. It's a total disruption of the school day."
Haworth said that is a choice for parents to make. Schools - unfortunately or fortunately - he said, have to deal with various social issues, including the Day of Silence, whether someone agrees with it or not.
The school corporation, however, is not sponsoring or promoting the Day of Silence.
Haworth said legal counsel through the Indiana School Board Assocation has told the school "not to interfere with the rights of students who are not being a disruption in the classroom, in the building or on the grounds."
