Gallery Audience Discusses Community Response To Domestic Violence
Posted
Tim Robertson-trobertson@timesuniononline.com
WINONA LAKE - Artists, students and community members gathered at the See the Need art gallery Thursday for a discussion about domestic violence and how to fight it in Kosciusko County.
See the Need is an annual art exhibit and three-day event dedicated to highlighting local social issues through the arts. Domestic violence is this year's topic, and Becky Moreno, victims assistance coordinator for the Warsaw Police Department, spent more than an hour speaking and answering audience questions to help increase awareness and sensitivity to the problem.
Moreno has spent 13 years working with victims of violence. She said, when it comes to violence or abuse in the home, the problem is more widespread than most people probably know.
"Even if someone hasn't been personally touched by domestic violence, you probably know someone who has," Moreno said.
Domestic violence includes physical, verbal and emotional abuse as well as controlling behavior. Moreno said about 95 percent of domestic abuse victims are women, but the problem isn't limited to one socio-economic class, educational level, race or age.The Victim Service Center and Beaman Home shelter are two local resources to help victims of domestic violence find safety. Victim Service Center offers crisis counseling, information, referrals and personal advocacy to victims of violent crime and their families. The Beaman Home provides a 24-hour crisis hotline, emergency shelter, food, clothing, counseling, transportation, social service, community referrals and child enhancement program to victims. The shelter also offers court and hospital advocacy, professional training and open-ended support groups to victims.
Moreno said, despite the available resources, it is often a long process for a victim to move to a safer environment. She said community awareness and compassion can make a big difference.
Moreno said victims of domestic violence are often afraid, ashamed and convinced that no one would believe them if they said anything about the abuse they are suffering. That's where a good friend, neighbor or family member can help.
"If you create an environment that's safe to her, so she knows you're going to believe her and encourage her, that will make a difference," Moreno said. "You can say with confidence to her, 'You aren't alone in this. It happens a lot, even in this community.'"
Moreno told the audience that victims' behavior does not always make sense to those around them.
"Don't tell her, 'Just leave,'" said Moreno. "When a woman leaves a domestic violence situation, her chances of being killed are 75 percent. If she doesn't have a plan in place, it's a very dangerous time for her."
Moreno also said victims often leave and go back to their abusers six to eight times before they leave for good. She said this can be hard on the victim's supporters, but it's important that they show unwavering care and support for the victim.
"Leaving isn't an event, it's a process," Moreno said. "When she goes back, don't send the message, 'You've burned this bridge.' Be a safe and accepting place for her. Make sure she knows you're safe. If she feels like she's burned all her bridges, she'll never leave."
Moreno said local churches also can play a key role in helping victims.
"Churches need to be involved in this," she said. "There is not a church in this county where someone has not experienced domestic violence."
Moreno said churches can be instrumental in spreading awareness, educating on available resources and creating an environment of care and compassion for victims. She said including information on resources for victims in church bulletins or in church buildings can do more than just circulate information.
"If a victim sees a brochure in your church, she may think, 'They might actually believe me,'" Moreno said.
Moreno also said pastors can focus on educating their congregations clearly that the scriptures do not allow for domestic abuse.
"Too often there's teaching on 'Women, submit to your husbands,' and they leave out the part 'Men, love your wives as Christ loved the church,'" Moreno said.
See the Need will open tonight and Saturday from 6 to 11 p.m. at New Horizon, 1300 Wooster Road, Winona Lake. Work from 12 local artists is featured in the gallery. For more information about See the Need and a full schedule, visit www.seetheneed.org
For more information on domestic violence, visit www.victimservicecenter.org or www.thebeamanhome.org
