Can Connor Cover? Football Zen: About As Real As Bigfoot

October 5, 2023 at 8:00 a.m.
San Francisco 49ers running back Christian McCaffrey reacts after scoring a rushing touchdown against the Arizona Cardinals during the second half of an NFL football game Sunday, Oct. 1, 2023, in Santa Clara, Calif. (AP Photo/Godofredo A. Vásquez)
San Francisco 49ers running back Christian McCaffrey reacts after scoring a rushing touchdown against the Arizona Cardinals during the second half of an NFL football game Sunday, Oct. 1, 2023, in Santa Clara, Calif. (AP Photo/Godofredo A. Vásquez) (Godofredo A. Vásquez)

By Connor McCann

At around 3 p.m. on Sunday afternoon, I was daydreaming about what this week’s introduction would look like.
My favorite soccer team, A.C. Milan, had won their weekend game 2-0 on Saturday to stay on top of the Italian league Serie A. My Missouri Tigers had everything clicking offensively and kept on winning, now sitting at 5-0 as LSU comes to town this weekend. It wasn’t locked in yet, but my fantasy football teams were on their way to a 3-0 week, scoring the most points I think I’ve ever scored combined in a single gameday. But most importantly, my Chicago Bears were up 28-7 in the third quarter and on their way to their first win in over eleven months.
I was about to achieve football zen, and man, I couldn’t wait to write about it.
Of course, I don’t need to tell you what happened next. The Bears blew their 21 point lead, tied for the largest blown advantage in franchise history, and lost 31-28 to a horrid Broncos team. This development absolutely shattered me. All of the good things that had already happened last weekend now meant nothing. Football zen was not only not achieved, but I declared it downright impossible.
As I sit here writing this introduction on Monday morning, I am still angry. I don’t know what us Bears fans did to deserve a team that clearly has no compassion for our wellbeing. As I mentioned earlier, this team hasn’t won since October 24, 2022 and shows no signs of winning any time soon. I am sick of writing about the Bears, and I’m sure you’re all sick of reading me whine about them.
However, I think there is a lesson to take away from this.
I may think football zen is impossible, but if everything possible has to go right for it to be achieved, isn’t any type of zen impossible in all walks of life? Nothing is ever going to go 100% our way, so maybe we should appreciate the little things and what we can control. There are plenty of things in life to be happy about, so why let one thing dictate your mood for an entire week?
Listen to me getting all philosophical. The Chicago Bears have really done a number on my brain.
Before I turn into the 15th Dalai Lama, let’s get into this week’s quick hitters.
I made my return to the movie theater on Sunday night, opting to go see Saw X with my girlfriend instead of watching the Taylor Swift love fest that the Sunday night game turned out to be. It was not for the faint of heart, but I was surprised by how much I liked it.
Staying in the realm of media, I started rewatching Family Guy for the thousandth time last week. It’s so stupid, but will never fail to make me laugh.
College football has been absolutely incredible this season. It feels as if any team in the top ten has legitimate title chances and there are probably a few sleepers we haven’t had close eyes on yet. We might finally get some new blood in the playoffs this year.
The Chicago White Sox ended their season by getting swept by the San Diego Padres, bringing their final record to 61-101. A team has never deserved to lose 100 games more. I couldn’t be happier the season is finally over.
While my picks weren’t as successful as the previous few weeks, I was still able to avoid my first losing record of the year. That’s really all we can ask for. We’ve reached the first week with teams on the bye, so every pick is going to mean that much more.
Let’s get down to business.
THURSDAY NIGHT
Chicago Bears at Washington Commanders (-5.5)

Shoutout to the schedule makers for putting the juggernaut Bears in primetime. I don’t know what’s more sad: how little hope I have for this franchise moving forward or the fact that I’m still delusional enough to believe they can cover this touchdown spread. Though, the Commanders looked pretty good in their overtime loss to the Eagles last week. Wait a second, what am I talking about? It’s the Bears!
The Pick: Commanders -5.5
ACROSS THE POND
Jacksonville Jaguars at Buffalo Bills (-5.5)

Not very often do teams play back-to-back games in London, but that’s exactly what Jacksonville is doing this week. The Jags got back on track with a win over the Falcons last weekend while the Bills absolutely throttled the Dolphins and took over as the team to beat in the AFC East. I think there has to be some advantage in Jacksonville playing overseas for the second week in a row, but I’m not sure that matters. Everything is clicking for Buffalo right now and I think they keep it going with a win, but do so by a narrow margin.
The Pick: Jaguars +5.5
1 O’CLOCK SUNDAY
Tennessee Titans at Indianapolis Colts (-1)

I still am not sure what to make of each of these teams. The Titans just crushed the Bengals when everyone was starting to believe it was over, while the Colts came back from down 23 points against the Rams before falling in OT. I do like what Indianapolis is building but the Titans seem to have the Colts' number, sweeping Indy in each of the last two seasons. Anthony Richardson obviously wasn’t on the team during Tennessee's run of success, and I think he makes the difference here. Jonathan Taylor returned to practice Wednesday, so that’s something to keep an eye on as well.
The Pick: Colts -1
Houston Texans at Atlanta Falcons (-2)

This is an interesting matchup. Few teams like passing the ball as much as Houston while few teams run the ball as well as Atlanta. The Texans continue to be disrespected. I don’t care that they’re the road team in this one, I truly believe they should be favorites. Desmond Ridder is not the answer at QB for the Falcons, and while the team has tons of talent at the skill positions, it's not going to matter much with him leading the charge. C.J. Stroud continues to impress week after week as the top rookie quarterback, and I think he keeps it rolling with another great performance in this one.
The Pick: Texans +2
Carolina Panthers at Detroit Lions (-9.5)

The Lions offense has been humming over the past few weeks, something that can not be said about the Panthers. Bryce Young has struggled in his limited action so far this season, but he doesn’t exactly have an electric roster around him to work with. People who read this with any regularity know that I once used to think that anything over a touchdown was too many points, but I’m slowly starting to see the error of my ways. At home, I can totally see the Lions winning this game by 10. Jameson Williams is coming back for Detroit, which should really open up their offense even more.
The Pick: Lions -9.5
Baltimore Ravens (-4) at Pittsburgh Steelers

You can throw out the record books when these teams match up. That may be one of my favorite cliches but it rings true when talking about Ravens-Steelers. Pittsburgh QB Kenny Pickett suffered a knee injury last week and is doubtful to play in this one. The Ravens had their way with a backup quarterback just last week against the Browns. Former Bear Mitch Trubisky would be the guy for the Steelers if Kenny can’t go. I don’t want to overthink this one. The Pittsburgh offense is abysmal, so I don’t think it's going to get any better with a backup quarterback under center. Give me Baltimore.
The Pick: Ravens -4
New Orleans Saints at New England Patriots (-1)

This game is basically a pick ‘em, which is a good thing because I will not be tuning in for this one. Two of the worst offenses in the league face off here and the over/under (40.5) reflects that. Mac Jones got benched last week, but I doubt he’s not the starter for this one. Derek Carr played with a sprained AC joint last weekend, and it showed, as most of his passes were behind the line of scrimmage. I would have to imagine he’s going to look a little bit better in this one, and the Saints defense is better suited to get the stops necessary to pull off the win.
The Pick: Saints +1
New York Giants at Miami Dolphins (-10.5)

The Giants may have a win this year, but they are definitely competing with the Bears for the title of worst team in football. Maybe it’s because they’ve played three primetime games, so the errors are magnified, but man, do the G-Men have a ton of problems. The Dolphins are going to come into this one a little peeved at how last week’s affair with Buffalo went, so I have a feeling they’re going to be ready to go at home. Maybe the Giants figure some stuff out on offense and maybe Saquon Barkley comes back, but I don’t think New York has the guns on defense to stop this high powered Miami offense.
The Pick: Dolphins -10.5
LATE AFTERNOON SLATE
Cincinnati Bengals (-3) at Arizona Cardinals

This is an absolute must win game for the Bengals, who would fall to 1-4 with a loss here. It won’t be easy though, as the Cardinals have been continuing to play tough football against all opponents this year. Joe Burrow is very clearly hurt, but the team continues to trot him out there in hopes of not losing a year of the window. I have not had good luck at all picking the Bengals this season, with my only win in any of their games coming when I picked against them Week 2. I’m hoping to break the trend this week, because I do think Cincy pulls this one off when they need it most.
The Pick: Bengals -3
Philadelphia Eagles (-4.5) at Los Angeles Rams

Philly is one of two undefeated teams left and will have a tough road contest against the Rams to deal with this week. It took the Eagles overtime at home to deal with the Commanders, while the Rams blew a 23-point lead to the Colts before going to overtime themselves and winning. Three of Philly’s four wins have been by a single score, so I expect this to be a close one as well. On paper this might sound a little crazy, but with the cross-country road trip and the fact that the Rams are still going a bit under the radar, don’t be surprised if the Eagles leave the City of Angels no longer unbeaten.
The Pick: Rams +4.5
Kansas City Chiefs (-5.5) at Minnesota Vikings

The Chiefs picked up a narrow win in New York against the Jets Sunday night, while the Vikings picked up their first win in Carolina. It’s not an easy ask for Minnesota to get back on track with a win against the defending Super Bowl champs here, but outside of a great performance against the helpless Bears, the KC offense hasn’t been lighting the world on fire like we’ve grown used to them doing. The Vikings haven’t lost three straight games at home to begin the season since 1972. I’m not saying they will win this one, but I wouldn’t be surprised to stay in this one until the very end.
The Pick: Vikings +5.5
New York Jets at Denver Broncos (-2.5)

The Jets still haven’t won since their opening game but Zach Wilson played perhaps his best game for the team on Sunday night against Kansas City. The Broncos went down 28-7 to the Bears before coming back and winning, as was discussed earlier. I still think Denver is one of the worst teams in football, and a win over the singular worst team is not going to change that. If Wilson can build off of the positive performance and the defense can get back to what got them that big win over Buffalo in early September, the Jets should be able to pull this off.
The Pick: Jets +2.5
WAITIN’ ALL DAY FOR A SUNDAY NIGHT
Dallas Cowboys at San Francisco 49ers (-3.5)

Now THIS is a primetime matchup I can get behind. Two of the best teams in the leagues through four weeks squaring off for both team’s first real test. The Cowboys defense speaks for itself, as does the production of Niners RB Christian McCaffrey. This truly is the unstoppable force meets an immovable object scenario. When looking at both teams, the biggest weakness on either side that I can see is Dallas’ production in the red zone. Too many possessions in good field position have ended in field goal attempts for the Cowboys. That can’t happen against a team like San Fran. The Niners seem to be on a mission this season and I think they stay undefeated.
The Pick: 49ers -3.5
MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL
Green Bay Packers (-1.5) at Las Vegas Raiders

Can somebody tell me why the Raiders have already gotten two primetime games this early in the season? They stink. The Packers might too, after getting waxed at home against the Lions last Thursday. Former Purdue QB Aiden O’Connell made his debut for Vegas last week, but committed too many turnovers to win. No word yet on whether Jimmy G will return for this one but I don’t think it matters much. I despise the Packers and picking against them makes my blood boil but I think they are the better of these two football teams.
The Pick: Packers -1.5
On bye week: Browns, Buccaneers, Chargers, Seahawks
I must say, these picks are getting harder by the week. I don’t know if I’m starting to overthink too much or if the pressure of keeping the winning streak going is finally getting to me. Either way, we hope for the best once again.
Cheers.
Last Week’s Record: 9-7
Season Record: 39-24-1

At around 3 p.m. on Sunday afternoon, I was daydreaming about what this week’s introduction would look like.
My favorite soccer team, A.C. Milan, had won their weekend game 2-0 on Saturday to stay on top of the Italian league Serie A. My Missouri Tigers had everything clicking offensively and kept on winning, now sitting at 5-0 as LSU comes to town this weekend. It wasn’t locked in yet, but my fantasy football teams were on their way to a 3-0 week, scoring the most points I think I’ve ever scored combined in a single gameday. But most importantly, my Chicago Bears were up 28-7 in the third quarter and on their way to their first win in over eleven months.
I was about to achieve football zen, and man, I couldn’t wait to write about it.
Of course, I don’t need to tell you what happened next. The Bears blew their 21 point lead, tied for the largest blown advantage in franchise history, and lost 31-28 to a horrid Broncos team. This development absolutely shattered me. All of the good things that had already happened last weekend now meant nothing. Football zen was not only not achieved, but I declared it downright impossible.
As I sit here writing this introduction on Monday morning, I am still angry. I don’t know what us Bears fans did to deserve a team that clearly has no compassion for our wellbeing. As I mentioned earlier, this team hasn’t won since October 24, 2022 and shows no signs of winning any time soon. I am sick of writing about the Bears, and I’m sure you’re all sick of reading me whine about them.
However, I think there is a lesson to take away from this.
I may think football zen is impossible, but if everything possible has to go right for it to be achieved, isn’t any type of zen impossible in all walks of life? Nothing is ever going to go 100% our way, so maybe we should appreciate the little things and what we can control. There are plenty of things in life to be happy about, so why let one thing dictate your mood for an entire week?
Listen to me getting all philosophical. The Chicago Bears have really done a number on my brain.
Before I turn into the 15th Dalai Lama, let’s get into this week’s quick hitters.
I made my return to the movie theater on Sunday night, opting to go see Saw X with my girlfriend instead of watching the Taylor Swift love fest that the Sunday night game turned out to be. It was not for the faint of heart, but I was surprised by how much I liked it.
Staying in the realm of media, I started rewatching Family Guy for the thousandth time last week. It’s so stupid, but will never fail to make me laugh.
College football has been absolutely incredible this season. It feels as if any team in the top ten has legitimate title chances and there are probably a few sleepers we haven’t had close eyes on yet. We might finally get some new blood in the playoffs this year.
The Chicago White Sox ended their season by getting swept by the San Diego Padres, bringing their final record to 61-101. A team has never deserved to lose 100 games more. I couldn’t be happier the season is finally over.
While my picks weren’t as successful as the previous few weeks, I was still able to avoid my first losing record of the year. That’s really all we can ask for. We’ve reached the first week with teams on the bye, so every pick is going to mean that much more.
Let’s get down to business.
THURSDAY NIGHT
Chicago Bears at Washington Commanders (-5.5)

Shoutout to the schedule makers for putting the juggernaut Bears in primetime. I don’t know what’s more sad: how little hope I have for this franchise moving forward or the fact that I’m still delusional enough to believe they can cover this touchdown spread. Though, the Commanders looked pretty good in their overtime loss to the Eagles last week. Wait a second, what am I talking about? It’s the Bears!
The Pick: Commanders -5.5
ACROSS THE POND
Jacksonville Jaguars at Buffalo Bills (-5.5)

Not very often do teams play back-to-back games in London, but that’s exactly what Jacksonville is doing this week. The Jags got back on track with a win over the Falcons last weekend while the Bills absolutely throttled the Dolphins and took over as the team to beat in the AFC East. I think there has to be some advantage in Jacksonville playing overseas for the second week in a row, but I’m not sure that matters. Everything is clicking for Buffalo right now and I think they keep it going with a win, but do so by a narrow margin.
The Pick: Jaguars +5.5
1 O’CLOCK SUNDAY
Tennessee Titans at Indianapolis Colts (-1)

I still am not sure what to make of each of these teams. The Titans just crushed the Bengals when everyone was starting to believe it was over, while the Colts came back from down 23 points against the Rams before falling in OT. I do like what Indianapolis is building but the Titans seem to have the Colts' number, sweeping Indy in each of the last two seasons. Anthony Richardson obviously wasn’t on the team during Tennessee's run of success, and I think he makes the difference here. Jonathan Taylor returned to practice Wednesday, so that’s something to keep an eye on as well.
The Pick: Colts -1
Houston Texans at Atlanta Falcons (-2)

This is an interesting matchup. Few teams like passing the ball as much as Houston while few teams run the ball as well as Atlanta. The Texans continue to be disrespected. I don’t care that they’re the road team in this one, I truly believe they should be favorites. Desmond Ridder is not the answer at QB for the Falcons, and while the team has tons of talent at the skill positions, it's not going to matter much with him leading the charge. C.J. Stroud continues to impress week after week as the top rookie quarterback, and I think he keeps it rolling with another great performance in this one.
The Pick: Texans +2
Carolina Panthers at Detroit Lions (-9.5)

The Lions offense has been humming over the past few weeks, something that can not be said about the Panthers. Bryce Young has struggled in his limited action so far this season, but he doesn’t exactly have an electric roster around him to work with. People who read this with any regularity know that I once used to think that anything over a touchdown was too many points, but I’m slowly starting to see the error of my ways. At home, I can totally see the Lions winning this game by 10. Jameson Williams is coming back for Detroit, which should really open up their offense even more.
The Pick: Lions -9.5
Baltimore Ravens (-4) at Pittsburgh Steelers

You can throw out the record books when these teams match up. That may be one of my favorite cliches but it rings true when talking about Ravens-Steelers. Pittsburgh QB Kenny Pickett suffered a knee injury last week and is doubtful to play in this one. The Ravens had their way with a backup quarterback just last week against the Browns. Former Bear Mitch Trubisky would be the guy for the Steelers if Kenny can’t go. I don’t want to overthink this one. The Pittsburgh offense is abysmal, so I don’t think it's going to get any better with a backup quarterback under center. Give me Baltimore.
The Pick: Ravens -4
New Orleans Saints at New England Patriots (-1)

This game is basically a pick ‘em, which is a good thing because I will not be tuning in for this one. Two of the worst offenses in the league face off here and the over/under (40.5) reflects that. Mac Jones got benched last week, but I doubt he’s not the starter for this one. Derek Carr played with a sprained AC joint last weekend, and it showed, as most of his passes were behind the line of scrimmage. I would have to imagine he’s going to look a little bit better in this one, and the Saints defense is better suited to get the stops necessary to pull off the win.
The Pick: Saints +1
New York Giants at Miami Dolphins (-10.5)

The Giants may have a win this year, but they are definitely competing with the Bears for the title of worst team in football. Maybe it’s because they’ve played three primetime games, so the errors are magnified, but man, do the G-Men have a ton of problems. The Dolphins are going to come into this one a little peeved at how last week’s affair with Buffalo went, so I have a feeling they’re going to be ready to go at home. Maybe the Giants figure some stuff out on offense and maybe Saquon Barkley comes back, but I don’t think New York has the guns on defense to stop this high powered Miami offense.
The Pick: Dolphins -10.5
LATE AFTERNOON SLATE
Cincinnati Bengals (-3) at Arizona Cardinals

This is an absolute must win game for the Bengals, who would fall to 1-4 with a loss here. It won’t be easy though, as the Cardinals have been continuing to play tough football against all opponents this year. Joe Burrow is very clearly hurt, but the team continues to trot him out there in hopes of not losing a year of the window. I have not had good luck at all picking the Bengals this season, with my only win in any of their games coming when I picked against them Week 2. I’m hoping to break the trend this week, because I do think Cincy pulls this one off when they need it most.
The Pick: Bengals -3
Philadelphia Eagles (-4.5) at Los Angeles Rams

Philly is one of two undefeated teams left and will have a tough road contest against the Rams to deal with this week. It took the Eagles overtime at home to deal with the Commanders, while the Rams blew a 23-point lead to the Colts before going to overtime themselves and winning. Three of Philly’s four wins have been by a single score, so I expect this to be a close one as well. On paper this might sound a little crazy, but with the cross-country road trip and the fact that the Rams are still going a bit under the radar, don’t be surprised if the Eagles leave the City of Angels no longer unbeaten.
The Pick: Rams +4.5
Kansas City Chiefs (-5.5) at Minnesota Vikings

The Chiefs picked up a narrow win in New York against the Jets Sunday night, while the Vikings picked up their first win in Carolina. It’s not an easy ask for Minnesota to get back on track with a win against the defending Super Bowl champs here, but outside of a great performance against the helpless Bears, the KC offense hasn’t been lighting the world on fire like we’ve grown used to them doing. The Vikings haven’t lost three straight games at home to begin the season since 1972. I’m not saying they will win this one, but I wouldn’t be surprised to stay in this one until the very end.
The Pick: Vikings +5.5
New York Jets at Denver Broncos (-2.5)

The Jets still haven’t won since their opening game but Zach Wilson played perhaps his best game for the team on Sunday night against Kansas City. The Broncos went down 28-7 to the Bears before coming back and winning, as was discussed earlier. I still think Denver is one of the worst teams in football, and a win over the singular worst team is not going to change that. If Wilson can build off of the positive performance and the defense can get back to what got them that big win over Buffalo in early September, the Jets should be able to pull this off.
The Pick: Jets +2.5
WAITIN’ ALL DAY FOR A SUNDAY NIGHT
Dallas Cowboys at San Francisco 49ers (-3.5)

Now THIS is a primetime matchup I can get behind. Two of the best teams in the leagues through four weeks squaring off for both team’s first real test. The Cowboys defense speaks for itself, as does the production of Niners RB Christian McCaffrey. This truly is the unstoppable force meets an immovable object scenario. When looking at both teams, the biggest weakness on either side that I can see is Dallas’ production in the red zone. Too many possessions in good field position have ended in field goal attempts for the Cowboys. That can’t happen against a team like San Fran. The Niners seem to be on a mission this season and I think they stay undefeated.
The Pick: 49ers -3.5
MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL
Green Bay Packers (-1.5) at Las Vegas Raiders

Can somebody tell me why the Raiders have already gotten two primetime games this early in the season? They stink. The Packers might too, after getting waxed at home against the Lions last Thursday. Former Purdue QB Aiden O’Connell made his debut for Vegas last week, but committed too many turnovers to win. No word yet on whether Jimmy G will return for this one but I don’t think it matters much. I despise the Packers and picking against them makes my blood boil but I think they are the better of these two football teams.
The Pick: Packers -1.5
On bye week: Browns, Buccaneers, Chargers, Seahawks
I must say, these picks are getting harder by the week. I don’t know if I’m starting to overthink too much or if the pressure of keeping the winning streak going is finally getting to me. Either way, we hope for the best once again.
Cheers.
Last Week’s Record: 9-7
Season Record: 39-24-1

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