Warsaw Woman Hopes to Share Story of Drug Recovery
July 28, 2016 at 4:25 p.m.
By Siara [email protected]
On the night of Oct. 23, 2013, she and her husband, Kelvin Lamarr Robinson, decided to experiment with heroin for the first time.
Mary, formerly of Warsaw and now living in Osceola, had more experience with drug use than her husband. She used marijuana recreationally, experimented with cocaine and was addicted to crack as a teenager. When she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2005, she became addicted to her pain medication. Her husband’s drug of choice was alcohol.
That night, they were home alone and decided they would smoke a joint, but wanted to intensify their high by adding heroin.
“That looks kind of funny,” Mary recalled saying to her husband as she watched him crush the heroin with a credit card and take a bump up both nostrils. She mimicked his actions and they sprinkled the remaining heroin onto the joint.
“If you start to feel funny, we’ll stop,” he had said.
The rest of the night was a complete mystery to Mary until she woke up three weeks later in the hospital with no recollection of anything after smoking the joint. She was completely unaware that her husband had died the night they tried heroin until the doctors came in to tell her. She wasn’t even able to attend the funeral.
“I went to take my blankets off, and I couldn’t move,” Robinson said during an interview Thursday.
She slowly began remembering her hallucinations. She had visible scars on her back and scars that trailed the backs of her legs. She had holes in her arms that revealed her bones and she was covered with blisters head to toe.
“It looked just like crocodile skin,” Robinson said.
She was told by the medical staff that the heroin she and her husband used was mixed with cocaine, meth, rat poisoning and paint thinner.
“You should have died with your husband,” she recalled the nurses telling her.
Robinson was able to leave the hospital after weeks of recovery and three and half months of dialysis.
“All because of one decision I made, I have to pay consequences for the rest of my life,” she said.
She moved to Missouri for eight months and moved back to Indiana once her depression started overtaking her.
“I never thought in a million years my last memory with my husband is us getting high,” Robinson said. “I even questioned God at first, ‘My husband was a better person than me, why didn’t you take me?’”
The move wasn’t easy, because she faced the disappointment of her husband’s family and her own family, mainly her brother.
“I think I hurt his heart most of all,” Robinson said. “He really looked up to me and I let him down.”
She hasn’t spoken to her husband’s children since his death. She fears she may never see her grandchildren again.
“It didn’t seem like real life,” Robinson said. “My eyes are wide open now, God has my attention. I was weak and broken down and I could have easily gone back to drugs, but I had my God, and my grandkids are the ones inspiring me now.”
Robinson wants to share her story about overcoming drug use and how it has changed her life in a more positive way today. She said she doesn’t abuse drugs and she doesn’t even take her prescription medications for her multiple sclerosis anymore.
She wants to speak at middle schools because she said this is where the curiosity and peer pressure begins. Robinson is also planning to start school in March to become a juvenile probation officer.
“If I can just reach one person with my story and what I went through, then I know I’ve done my job,” she said.
She said she has a positive outlook and plan for her future. She wants to pursue some of the dreams she and her husband shared. They planned and prepaid for a vacation that she has yet to take, but she hopes to go soon with her own daughters.
Robinson flipped through her cell phone and found videos of her husband telling her that he loved her. She said he may be gone physically, but she will always have their memories.
She said if it wasn’t for losing him, she probably wouldn’t have woken up, and she would have continued her drug use. She plans on focusing on the positives and embracing each new day.
“Sometimes it takes us a lot longer to realize what we’re doing to our bodies or to our families, and a lot of people don’t realize you’re hurting everyone around you who cares about you,” she said. “I’m living proof that miracles happen.”[[In-content Ad]]
On the night of Oct. 23, 2013, she and her husband, Kelvin Lamarr Robinson, decided to experiment with heroin for the first time.
Mary, formerly of Warsaw and now living in Osceola, had more experience with drug use than her husband. She used marijuana recreationally, experimented with cocaine and was addicted to crack as a teenager. When she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2005, she became addicted to her pain medication. Her husband’s drug of choice was alcohol.
That night, they were home alone and decided they would smoke a joint, but wanted to intensify their high by adding heroin.
“That looks kind of funny,” Mary recalled saying to her husband as she watched him crush the heroin with a credit card and take a bump up both nostrils. She mimicked his actions and they sprinkled the remaining heroin onto the joint.
“If you start to feel funny, we’ll stop,” he had said.
The rest of the night was a complete mystery to Mary until she woke up three weeks later in the hospital with no recollection of anything after smoking the joint. She was completely unaware that her husband had died the night they tried heroin until the doctors came in to tell her. She wasn’t even able to attend the funeral.
“I went to take my blankets off, and I couldn’t move,” Robinson said during an interview Thursday.
She slowly began remembering her hallucinations. She had visible scars on her back and scars that trailed the backs of her legs. She had holes in her arms that revealed her bones and she was covered with blisters head to toe.
“It looked just like crocodile skin,” Robinson said.
She was told by the medical staff that the heroin she and her husband used was mixed with cocaine, meth, rat poisoning and paint thinner.
“You should have died with your husband,” she recalled the nurses telling her.
Robinson was able to leave the hospital after weeks of recovery and three and half months of dialysis.
“All because of one decision I made, I have to pay consequences for the rest of my life,” she said.
She moved to Missouri for eight months and moved back to Indiana once her depression started overtaking her.
“I never thought in a million years my last memory with my husband is us getting high,” Robinson said. “I even questioned God at first, ‘My husband was a better person than me, why didn’t you take me?’”
The move wasn’t easy, because she faced the disappointment of her husband’s family and her own family, mainly her brother.
“I think I hurt his heart most of all,” Robinson said. “He really looked up to me and I let him down.”
She hasn’t spoken to her husband’s children since his death. She fears she may never see her grandchildren again.
“It didn’t seem like real life,” Robinson said. “My eyes are wide open now, God has my attention. I was weak and broken down and I could have easily gone back to drugs, but I had my God, and my grandkids are the ones inspiring me now.”
Robinson wants to share her story about overcoming drug use and how it has changed her life in a more positive way today. She said she doesn’t abuse drugs and she doesn’t even take her prescription medications for her multiple sclerosis anymore.
She wants to speak at middle schools because she said this is where the curiosity and peer pressure begins. Robinson is also planning to start school in March to become a juvenile probation officer.
“If I can just reach one person with my story and what I went through, then I know I’ve done my job,” she said.
She said she has a positive outlook and plan for her future. She wants to pursue some of the dreams she and her husband shared. They planned and prepaid for a vacation that she has yet to take, but she hopes to go soon with her own daughters.
Robinson flipped through her cell phone and found videos of her husband telling her that he loved her. She said he may be gone physically, but she will always have their memories.
She said if it wasn’t for losing him, she probably wouldn’t have woken up, and she would have continued her drug use. She plans on focusing on the positives and embracing each new day.
“Sometimes it takes us a lot longer to realize what we’re doing to our bodies or to our families, and a lot of people don’t realize you’re hurting everyone around you who cares about you,” she said. “I’m living proof that miracles happen.”[[In-content Ad]]
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