Family Adopts Ukrainian Girl
July 28, 2016 at 4:25 p.m.
SYRACUSE - What is a family?
Is it determined only by blood? Or is a family more than biology?
For Kevin and Wendy Hite, Milford, their family is not limited to blood relatives alone. Both Wendy's grandmother and mother are adoptees. And now Kevin and Wendy are parents of their own adopted daughter, Aleeza, 8, from Belagroad-Dnestrousky, Ukraine, with plans to adopt Aleeza's 13-year-old deaf sister Olga.
"We've been very familiar with adoption forever so it feels like it was meant to be," said Wendy.
"We were not physically capable of having a child ourselves," said Kevin. "Alternative methods did not interest us. We decided to look into adoption."
Wendy said they looked at domestic versus international adoption. Their doctor had a patient who wanted to give up her baby, but she decided to choose another family. Wendy said she wasn't upset as she never felt like that baby was going to be theirs anyway.
As the Hites continued to look to adopt, a California agency told the Hites they could get them a baby in six months for $27,000.
"That seemed shady," said Kevin. But it did push the Hites toward international adoption. If the Hites adopted a child in the United States, there was a chance the birth parent could reclaim the child. That was less likely to happen if they adopted a child from another country.
Six years ago, Wendy volunteered at a Polish orphanage. Looking into adopting a child from Poland led them to looking at adopting a child from the Ukraine. In the Ukraine, parents give up their children for adoption because they are too poor to raise them.
Kevin said they wanted to adopt a healthy child. In the U.S., there was the likelihood an adopted child would come from parents with drug problems. Not so with Ukrainians who are too poor to afford a drug problem.
As the Hites became more interested in adopting a child from the Ukraine, Wendy said she believed a girl in the Ukraine was waiting for them. "I dreamed of a girl," said Wendy.
In October 2003, the Hites began the adoption process.
They decided to request a girl between the ages of 2 to 6. Upon arrival, however, the orphanage had no girl in that age range. They looked at pictures of possibilities and Aleeza's photo was the first one of the stack, but they looked at the other photos just to be sure.
"I saw all these faces, these little people and I was overwhelmed. Kevin knew right away" Aleeza was the one, said Wendy.
After the Hites decided to meet Aleeza, that's when they were told she had a sister three hours away at an orphanage for the deaf.
In the Ukraine, at age 16, orphans are turned loose into the streets. At age 13, Olga (pronounced Olya) had been in an orphanage nine years.
As Hite is the special education services supervisor for Wawasee Schools and Kevin has been learning sign language, they took it as a sign that it was meant to be.
To adopt Aleeza, it cost the Hites approximately $23,000. "So much of this was bribes," said Kevin. And while the Hites were in the Ukraine, both of the country's presidential elections were taking place. "Everyone's bribe fees went up."
On Nov. 10, the Hites finally got to meet Aleeza. They took a doctor with them for a medical and psychological examination. They were told from the get-go she was healthy, but they wanted to make sure. Overall, the doctor said, she was perfectly healthy.
After deciding to adopt Aleeza, Aleeza had to agree to be adopted. Then Aleeza's sister had to sign papers that the Hites could adopt Aleeza.
For three weeks, in a cramped room in the orphanage, the Hites lived with Aleeza. Between 9 a.m. and 7 p.m., the room had no water. The bed was a pull-out couch. If the Hites went out, they couldn't speak and could only go out one at a time while the other stayed back with Aleeza.
"It was quite scary because you didn't want people to know you're American," said Wendy.
To help Aleeza adjust to her new life, they are teaching her English and American sign language. The Hites attend a Ukrainian Church in Goshen where services are in English and Ukrainian.
Along the way, people the Hites know and don't know have been very supportive. "There's no way we can express our thanks to all the people who have shown support for us and what we're doing," said Kevin.
Wendy said, "We've become great friends with people we've never met just by going through the process."
Wendy said she was never sad when she was having problems while trying to conceive and then adopting. They just put it in God's hands.
"I feel like she is our daughter and we've had her forever," said Wendy.
"She loves school. She started gymnastics last week and loves that. Everything's just falling into place."
The Hites hope to adopt Olga this year by summer or early fall. To pay for the expenses, Wendy's father, Roger Bayak, set up an account at Lake City Bank and is working on a number of fund-raisers. Wendy's brother put together a Web site and the Hites already have received some donations.
Kevin said they are happy with Aleeza, but their family isn't complete until Olga is with them.
Wendy said, "If our story helps spread the word that adoption can be a wonderful thing, that's what we want people to know." [[In-content Ad]]
SYRACUSE - What is a family?
Is it determined only by blood? Or is a family more than biology?
For Kevin and Wendy Hite, Milford, their family is not limited to blood relatives alone. Both Wendy's grandmother and mother are adoptees. And now Kevin and Wendy are parents of their own adopted daughter, Aleeza, 8, from Belagroad-Dnestrousky, Ukraine, with plans to adopt Aleeza's 13-year-old deaf sister Olga.
"We've been very familiar with adoption forever so it feels like it was meant to be," said Wendy.
"We were not physically capable of having a child ourselves," said Kevin. "Alternative methods did not interest us. We decided to look into adoption."
Wendy said they looked at domestic versus international adoption. Their doctor had a patient who wanted to give up her baby, but she decided to choose another family. Wendy said she wasn't upset as she never felt like that baby was going to be theirs anyway.
As the Hites continued to look to adopt, a California agency told the Hites they could get them a baby in six months for $27,000.
"That seemed shady," said Kevin. But it did push the Hites toward international adoption. If the Hites adopted a child in the United States, there was a chance the birth parent could reclaim the child. That was less likely to happen if they adopted a child from another country.
Six years ago, Wendy volunteered at a Polish orphanage. Looking into adopting a child from Poland led them to looking at adopting a child from the Ukraine. In the Ukraine, parents give up their children for adoption because they are too poor to raise them.
Kevin said they wanted to adopt a healthy child. In the U.S., there was the likelihood an adopted child would come from parents with drug problems. Not so with Ukrainians who are too poor to afford a drug problem.
As the Hites became more interested in adopting a child from the Ukraine, Wendy said she believed a girl in the Ukraine was waiting for them. "I dreamed of a girl," said Wendy.
In October 2003, the Hites began the adoption process.
They decided to request a girl between the ages of 2 to 6. Upon arrival, however, the orphanage had no girl in that age range. They looked at pictures of possibilities and Aleeza's photo was the first one of the stack, but they looked at the other photos just to be sure.
"I saw all these faces, these little people and I was overwhelmed. Kevin knew right away" Aleeza was the one, said Wendy.
After the Hites decided to meet Aleeza, that's when they were told she had a sister three hours away at an orphanage for the deaf.
In the Ukraine, at age 16, orphans are turned loose into the streets. At age 13, Olga (pronounced Olya) had been in an orphanage nine years.
As Hite is the special education services supervisor for Wawasee Schools and Kevin has been learning sign language, they took it as a sign that it was meant to be.
To adopt Aleeza, it cost the Hites approximately $23,000. "So much of this was bribes," said Kevin. And while the Hites were in the Ukraine, both of the country's presidential elections were taking place. "Everyone's bribe fees went up."
On Nov. 10, the Hites finally got to meet Aleeza. They took a doctor with them for a medical and psychological examination. They were told from the get-go she was healthy, but they wanted to make sure. Overall, the doctor said, she was perfectly healthy.
After deciding to adopt Aleeza, Aleeza had to agree to be adopted. Then Aleeza's sister had to sign papers that the Hites could adopt Aleeza.
For three weeks, in a cramped room in the orphanage, the Hites lived with Aleeza. Between 9 a.m. and 7 p.m., the room had no water. The bed was a pull-out couch. If the Hites went out, they couldn't speak and could only go out one at a time while the other stayed back with Aleeza.
"It was quite scary because you didn't want people to know you're American," said Wendy.
To help Aleeza adjust to her new life, they are teaching her English and American sign language. The Hites attend a Ukrainian Church in Goshen where services are in English and Ukrainian.
Along the way, people the Hites know and don't know have been very supportive. "There's no way we can express our thanks to all the people who have shown support for us and what we're doing," said Kevin.
Wendy said, "We've become great friends with people we've never met just by going through the process."
Wendy said she was never sad when she was having problems while trying to conceive and then adopting. They just put it in God's hands.
"I feel like she is our daughter and we've had her forever," said Wendy.
"She loves school. She started gymnastics last week and loves that. Everything's just falling into place."
The Hites hope to adopt Olga this year by summer or early fall. To pay for the expenses, Wendy's father, Roger Bayak, set up an account at Lake City Bank and is working on a number of fund-raisers. Wendy's brother put together a Web site and the Hites already have received some donations.
Kevin said they are happy with Aleeza, but their family isn't complete until Olga is with them.
Wendy said, "If our story helps spread the word that adoption can be a wonderful thing, that's what we want people to know." [[In-content Ad]]